oh man my loves. this has not been an easy road for me this time. so many emotions. a body that just broke down and said "guess what? you're going to listen to me or i quit."
it's been great though.
because. it's been a steady stream of a mindfulness that can not longer ignore mindfulness.
week 3 of sharon's 28 day meditation challenge was mindfulness of emotions. as i mentioned, week 2 was mindfulness of the body. frankly, for me, they might as well be the same - it's the reason i'm so dedicated to my yoga practice, why i love spin and running and and and. wanting to be thin is not going to give you the perseverance to go to the gym 6+ days a week for 3 years straight...but sanity might. and i've found that my emotions and my body are so intimately connected, it is like a shot of xanax and prozac to sweat it out and sweat it out good. (and so much more cost effective with brilliant side effects like a 6-pack instead of dry mouth or an upset stomach!)
but just because you're more sane, doesn't mean you're not still deaf. and i've been a little deaf for a while. deaf to the limits of my body. deaf to the power of my emotions and my more recent attempts to ignore them.
well let me tell you. meditation will not let you remain deaf.
and this is both beautiful and hard. because being humbled into submission -feeling feelings - BIG feelings - that are not going to go away when you ignore them...or, more in my case, exhaust them...can really get in the way of all that productivity and efficiency we're so programmed to seek.
so. my message for this week? meditation will not lie to you. but it is your friend. because if you can't reconcile with the truth, you can't reconcile with NO-BODY.
happy friday loves.
- Lani Rowe