Today, I had to travel--two and a half hours drive into Fresno then back. We left the house about 7:45 this morning and just returned at a little after five--as the light left the sky. So, most of the day, I've had appointments, phone calls, wrangling with Governement forms, Fed ex stops, doctor's visits, shots, then shopping, lunch and then more driving.
When to meditate? Well, I decided why not just "be in the moment?" I closed my eyes in the car about 20 minutes away from our house. Don't worry I was the passenger, not the driver. I began to focus on the breath, moving from the base of my spine and up and up to to the top of my chest. In and out. And as I focused on that breath, I also visualized the chakras.
Now, I am not sure if this is "meditation." But, it felt centering. I was intensely visualizing the red root chakra at the base of my spine....then moving up with the breath to a point just below my navel to see a deep orange ball of energy. Thick and almost furry like a tennis ball. I stayed here a long time. I think this part of my body needs some energy. It felt good to direct my awareness to this one place that I often ignore.
What I found was that I began to envision that orange ball in a forest of green. Then, the forest begot a memory of traipsing through the woods where I grew up in West Virginia, climbing over limestone rocks and grabbing thick tree roots to make my way through the thick undergrowth. Towering trees. Quiet. My little sister, my constant companion, right behind. We played in those woods every day that we could--imagining that we were in a secret city far from danger.
But, back to the present--a feeling of sadness about my sister--sometimes, I did not treat her so well--was imperious and commanding. I felt a hot wave of shame from that orange belly. Oh, Cindy--forgive me. Be kind. Be kind.
And here I am winding my way up a steep and icy road through another wood. Breathing in, breathing out. Feeling my solar plexis--a burning yellow ball-- bigger than the orange and the red below. A large roaring sun of a chakra. And breathing and visualizing and knowing that Larry, my Dearest, would get us up this hill and back to the house in safety. And knowing that he was pleased to be ferrying his car-Meditating, Doctor- office -parking lot-Yoga Practitioning Woman. No judgment. No embarrassment. No need to tense at the sudden curve or wonder about the ice. What will be will be.
He drove, I breathed. Quiet except for the murmur of a staticky radio telling of unrest in Egypt. Always unrest. What can I do? Focus on the green of the heart chakra. Let that energy support me. Let it envelope all those I love. And trust that it reaches those I would love.
So, up my body, to the blue of the throat chakra, indigo third eye to the top. Those last two, I am not quite feeling. Maybe I needed more time.
But, Larry backed the car up, turned and backed into a space. Turned the key off. We were home. Peace.