I appreciate Sharon’s insight that we don’t plan to have negative thoughts. As a psychologist, and fellow human, I know that while we may not intentionally plan to think maladaptively, we are often so entrenched in thinking habits that we don’t recognize that we are actually training ourselves to think poorly. In this way, we set into motion thought loops like some type of perpetual motion machine.
Last week I wrote about my favorite thinking errors below. I am curious to hear which of these were useful to identify as a possible root of struggle.
“All or None thinking,” – Seeing things in black and white like, “Well this day is shot!” “I will never write a single cohesive sentence today!”
“Catastrophizing” – Making a mountain out of a molehill. “I can’t write under these circumstances” “I’ll never meet my deadline” “someone else is going to write my book” “I’ll never get published” “I’ll never have a book” etc.
The “Shoulds”- If you’re telling yourself what you need to do, must do, ought to do, chances are there is a SHOULD statement under there! I should have worked this weekend. I should have known better than to start this project. I should have X, Y, Y and on and on. STOP “SHOULDING” on yourself!
The mind is never satisfied as it has become accustomed to being fed by these thought patterns. Even after we succeed and have a publisher or get published the thoughts move to Ill never get this written; the publisher will wish they hadn’t accepted my book; Nobody will read my book; My book will be on the clearance rack. You get the point.
Who is with me in this challenge? Let’s remember- It is a practice, not a perfect! I welcome you to try this 5-minute meditation on thoughts http://mymindfulwayoflife.com/blog4/client-5-minute-meditations/