I have what might be more like a question today.
Occasionally, including today, in sitting practice, comes a moment in which all the building blocks seem to click into place and sitting is suddenly easy, balanced, effortless, erect, self supporting, self sustaining (until I start thinking about it), and blissful. At the same time a smile, as if my face is possessed, streams across my face. The feeling is wonderful. But, And, it feels like this is happening in spite of myself. I can observe it happening.
In performance practice, in a particular tradition, there is something called The Four Brothers. It this practice there is a way of looking at what you are doing with 4 criteria: 1. A feeling of Form 2. A feeling of Ease 3. A feeling of Beauty 4. A feeling of Wholeness (the order I just made is mine).
This sitting feeling I am trying to describe feels like this. There comes a moment when the last tick of the spine lines up just perfectly and the entire sitting posture simple drops into place. It’s whole and self contained and absolutely easy. Only thinking about it and judging it makes it begin to wobble a little. But I can observe it and walk around it and abide within it. It is a beautiful container for lots and lots of breath.
There is a moment too of mistrust that often comes – but doesn’t necessarily break the feeling. But I wonder whether I’m not just getting into a trance, or self hypnotized, or what? And I wonder, once in this place, what do I do now? Should I contemplate Death? contemplate Emptiness? start sending out loving compassion thoughts? visualize the jewel tree? Or simply, mindfully notice the body and this utterly unique sensation?
Image credit: http://learningdays.tumblr.com/post/24066538201/shiva-linga-mudra-energy-enhancing-for