In the daily busyness of my life I missed much of week 2. I find it hard to find time for the meditations like Drinking Tea or Walking, or even time to sit and write a daily post about that day’s lesson.
Since I have the responsibility of taking care of the kitchen in our house, I have the opportunity to practice mindfulness of washing the dishes and maintaining the awareness of just washing the dishes. It’s very hard because my thoughts like to wander during this activity. I’m getting better at reining them in and focusing on the sensations. The suds. The feel of the water on my hands. The hardness of the metal dishes. The sensation of the heat of the water, and more.
Moving into week 3 I put off listening to each meditation. I finally sat down and listened to them together. Doing it this way provided a cohesiveness of Mental Noting. A practice I work on using daily.
When it comes to difficulties and challenges in life, I have one in particular. I am not able to get to a neutral place with someone in my life. It is very frustrating that I let anger over run my thoughts, control my actions. It is beyond just a power struggle, there’s negative energy between this person and myself. I’m hoping that having this daily practice will help me get to that neutral place when I have interactions with this person. And that energy won’t affect me. I’ve been striving for some kind of equanimity. It still eludes me. Being with emotions is really hard for many people, but I’m pretty good at it.
I’ve been through a lot of therapy in my life. In fact, the last intensive therapy I went through was based in the idea that we can change our thoughts and our habits through mindfulness and meditation. And it was, in fact, this therapy that brought me to Sharon. And this program.
Once again I appreciate this program and daily practice.
I’m hoping to not skip any more sessions and make the time each day to sit with the meditation lesson, and then sit for another 20-30 minutes for a breath, loving kindness meditation, forgiveness meditation.