My Gurus

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I’ve been sharing a running gag with my partner for some time saying things like, “That TSA agent is your guru”, or “This airport are my guru”, or “This year’s polar vortex is my guru”, etc.  It’s funny and gives a light distance to the “trouble” at hand.  Now I’ve taken to this practice as I sit.  I have been envisioning a row of people sitting in buddha-guru opulence, on plush cushions, with beatific (or smug depending on ones point of view on the day) smiles and calm (or cold depending) eyes.  In my mind I ritually bow to The Ex, The Father, The High School Bully, The Former Friend/Mentor, and I’ve been bowing to them in turn and wishing them well before I start my breathing.  It feels a little dopey and pretend-y at first.  But, I find that after some time of doing this, though often painful sensations arise in the body, I can find a gentle distance that allows me to smile, to let go, and to relax in the face of these gurus.  The agitation becomes less personal, the story less engaging, and the physical sensation less painful – just sensation.  It doesn’t always work, but more and more as I practice. And I realize there is enough space to go around.  Room for them, for me, for all of it.  And then I see them smile at me as if to say, See that wasn’t so bad.  We’re all suffering and recovering. Good luck. And thank you.

Peace.