Happy week 4 everyone! After reading Sharon’s blog post this week, I’ve thought a lot about how the practice is showing up in my life and what others notice or mention to me. It’s also a little hard to do it without sounding like I’m bragging…but here goes:
Metta has changed EVERYTHING. Period. I’m not angry and resentful all the time. I don’t walk into a room and size everyone up and make quick judgments and just write people off because of their appearance. I no longer have the incessant loop, running on repeat in my head, second guessing and beating myself up for everything I’ve done, said or thought. I sleep like a baby and wake up WAY better than before. People are actually happy to see me and even tell me they want my “inner peace”…an actual quote. I have animals and birds come to me or near me all the time, I’ve fed wild birds out of my hand and walked right next to skunks and said hi. I’ve been told I’m “different” now, I’ve been told I look so happy, I’ve been told I’m so nice and I’ve been told at times that I’m radiant or glow. Cool, huh?
Now I must say that I’ve experienced all these things and been told these things and I know in my heart of hearts that I’m different and experience a baseline of happiness and ease, that I’ve never experienced before…..AND I still have more to go! Although friends and sangha mates and students give me praise and compliment me, my wife might not feel exactly the same way as the rest. I don’t come home to a matching band, if you catch my drift. It’s one thing to live this stuff in the world, but it’s another thing to live this in the place that probably means the most. And this makes me happy, I get to grow more, I get to heal more, I have more work to do. It’s good news….and a work in progress.
Thank you for sharing your practice with us this month. Thank you for reading these posts. And in the words of one of our Against the Stream teachers, George Haas, “I love you, keep going”.